The Beauty of God

It is rare that I write or even speak about the beauty of God. The main reason being that I am often not experiencing it in my daily life. Yet there are times when I have experienced it and it is beautiful. It is a moment that is so precious that I wish it could could last forever. It is like the first time you meet that man or woman that you may or may not be in love with. The passion in your heart is so strong you feel like your going to explode. Of course these moments are dynamic. God does not so much change as does our perception and understanding of him. At least that's what I think. In Psalm 16:11 these words are stated "Thou wilt show me the path of life: in thy presence is fullness of joy; at thy right hand are pleasures for evermore". I Like this verse because it is stated in the affirmative. God is saying that he is going to show us the way of Life. There is no question about it. However, whether we choose to follow this path of life or not is up to us. Personally, I sometimes choose darkness over life. I often choose to isolate myself from others rather than be in community. I choose to believe the lies that were told to me when I was younger rather than the truth of God's word. I choose relationships with women that usually have the potential of going no where and end up being a painful experience for both of us. Yet, there are times when I choose life. There are times when I refuse the lies. There are times when I push and challenge myself. There are times when I choose community rather than isolation. When I choose to be a blessing to others instead of a stumbling block. Where I choose to encourage rather than look for encouragement. When I do these things the life of God infuses me and I often experience joy. I know this is not a formula for the joy of the Lord but it does point me to ward the path of life and breaks the heavy grip of self absorption which can choke us spiritually and potentially kill us physically.

Shadows

Today I went for an interview at a rehabilitation centre for men. I saw hues and shadows of my father throughout this establishment. The brokenness of these men was palpable and real. I hated it. The dislike came from several different places. I was reminded that the man who gave me life is now an alcoholic and transient at best. That being said, I have to remember that my earthly father can not alter the work that God has done in my life. "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come ! " (2 Corinthians 5:17). Nevertheless, our past does affect us to a certain degree, but not to the point where we are defined by it. I find that I constantly need to remind myself that I am not my father. I am first and foremost a child of the Kings of Kings and Lord of Lords and need to cling to that reality.

Choice

My first blog. My first entry. I have been discussing the power of choice recently with those I have come into contact with. It is such a strange thing. Sometimes we want to deny that we even possess it and then blame God for the wrong choices that we actually make. If I'm honest sometimes I hate the power of choice. The reason being that I don't trust myself to make the right the decision. In fact, I would rather God make all my choices for me. But if that were the case I would probably hate him because he would have taken away all my freedom. In Joshua 24:15 there is a challenge given to Israel. Or maybe it was an admonition. Whatever it was, God speaking through Joshua told Israel to choose, either serve Ball or serve me. In this verse Joshua declares that he and his household will serve the Lord. A simple and yet profound statement. Whatever God is I believe that it is safe to say that he possesses emotions. There are countless accounts in the Old Testament as well as the New where God is angry and yet loving, compassionate and yet firm. This being the case, is it any wonder that God wants his people to serve him because they want to not due to the fact that they feel obligated or coerced in some way. Sometimes I feel like God restricts me and boxes me in but the truth is that he has given me complete freedom to serve him wholeheartedly or not. It's ironic, but true, that I am actually living out this scenario with a woman that I am seeing right now. Everything that is within me wants to be with her. However, I want her to desire me as much as I desire her. Nevertheless, I won't try to manipulate or somehow impress her so that she feels that same why I do. The main reason being that love does not attempt to control. Whatever the result will be God knows, but I think I have a greater understanding of my heavenly father's heart for his children. God loves us so much that he will never violate our free will. He wants us to be with him because we want to . Not because we fear him or feel obligated to be with him. What kind of relationship is that ?